Pharmaceutical Sitcom.

Article published on June 12, 2009
Article published on June 12, 2009
ACT 1, SCENE 1 The interior of a Chilean pharmacy of the national chain X. Looks like a small swanky supermarket, adorned with large panels ('30% off antivirals in june only!). Several clients browsing the shelves full of mainstream cosmetics. Five cashiers at the end of the shop.

Enters Piola, she picks up a numbered ticket close to the cashiers, sighs as she realises she's in for a long queue, and explores the make-up removers' section to while away.

Pharmacy assistant A: ...83?

A lady approaches cashier A to pay a pack of nappies, a chocolate ice-cream and cotton pads.

Pharmacy assistant D: 84? ... 85? 86?

An old man approaches cashier D with a scary list of prescriptions.

Pharmacy assistant B: 87? 88?

Piola approaches cashier B.

Piola: Hiya! Could you give me the price of the Soandso pill?

Pharmacy assistant B, typing on her computer: 10.450 pesos.

Piola: How about the two-month treatment?

Pharmacy assistant B: 13.800 pesos.

Piola: Great, then I'll get two months please!

Pharmacy assistant B: Would you like a bottle of mouthwash for only 1.490 pesos?

Piola: No thanks.

Pharmacy assistant B: We also have an astounding offer, 990 pesos for three packs of paracetamol!

Piola: No thanks.

Pharmacy assistant B: Would you like a moisturising body cream for only 1.290 pesos?

Piola: No.

Pharmacy assistant B: OK, so it will be 13.800 pesos. Do you have the pharmacy X loyalty card?

Piola: NO.

Pharmacy assistant B: Would you like to register to obtain the pharmacy X loyalty card?

Piola: No.

Pharmacy assistant B proceeds with the payment and puts the drugs in a plastic bag.

Piola: Thanks, I don't need a bag.

Pharmacy assistant B: Eh?

Piola: I prefer not to have a plastic bag.

Pharmacy assistant B, incredulous: But...?

Piola: It'd be wasted.

Pharmacy assistant B, with an imploring look that seems to say: 'But it's free!": Are you sure?

Piola: Yeah, I'll just put it in my handbag.

Pharmacy assistant B, between contempt and compassion: Ah.